Kristy (Kris) and Tom met through a dating app, and when Tom used a random number generator to pick their first date, it was love at first spreadsheet. We’ve been married for over five years and have an amazing son, Xavier. We live together in a quiet neighborhood in upstate New York, surrounded by trees and walking paths. Our family has a strong commitment to learning, and you can typically find us at the library, a museum, park, or farmers market, or traveling to new places and visiting museums, parks, and markets there. We also have two cats, Kaladin and Solstice.
All three of us are excited to bring a new child into our family. As Xavier says, “love is the glue that sticks us together,” and we have so much love to share. We are looking forward to starting our new chapter together and to a new child joining in our adventures and explorations of the world.
About Kris
About: Kris is an archaeologist and project manager working for a renewable energy permitting agency. I have a variety of hobbies, including almost anything outdoors (e.g., gardening, hiking, camping, fishing, ice fishing, snowboarding), traveling, board games, playing the piano, crafting and sewing, baking, and visiting a variety of fairs and cultural events (e.g., renaissance fairs, highland games, farmers’ markets).
Fun Fact: Kris owns a 48-acre farm where we all spend time together in the summer – baling hay when the sun shines and exploring nature. We even got married there! In my younger days, I was a fire performer at festivals, and still spin poi (typically flag poi – no fire needed) for fun to entertain kiddos. Exploring new places with Xavier is my #1 favorite activity. I’m a big cheesehead (Green Bay Packers fan), and a volunteer professor who does academic research on the archaeology of sound in my off-hours.
About Tom
About: Tom is a mechanical engineer working in the aerospace industry. In his free time, he enjoys reading, woodworking, skiing, cycling, fencing (the kind with swords), hiking, and board games. Traveling to new places and learning about the history and culture make for a fantastic vacation.
Fun Fact: Tom was nationally ranked in fencing for two years in undergrad while he was an officer of the school club. I first learned to fence from my dad and look forward to teaching our children the sport. I made Xavier his own hardwood Pickler triangle (indoor jungle gym) for his second Christmas. I was once inside the famous skyscraper Taipei 101 for the New Year’s celebration.
About Xavier
About: Xavier attends pre-K at a private school and is a future big brother. His hobbies include reading books, playing with Legos and other toys, anything Spiderman (books, toys, games), visiting fairs and cultural events (especially Renaissance fairs), traveling, baking, math club, swimming, and making new friends.
Fun Fact: Xavier loves books. This year, our family joined the “Friends of the Library,” and we hope to help convert some of his love (and ours) into acts of kindness to support the community & local libraries.
Our Lives
During the week, we spend time after school and work cooking meals together as a family, and exercising together (family walks or bike rides in the summer, and a bounce house in the basement in the winter). We usually let Xavier direct playtime in the evenings, which might involve reading, crafts, Lego, or other toys. On Friday nights, you can find us at dinner with friends and their children, exploring new restaurants in the area. On the weekends, we try to spend one day at home or visiting family, and one day out and about within the community. We typically spend 4-6 weeks travelling each year, including visits to family in Texas, the big family reunion, vacation getaways, and road trips. We prefer to be present in the moment together, and any downtime is spent with books or toys, rather than on screens or devices.
Our parenting style focuses on working as a family to develop empathy and respect; taking “time-outs” not as discipline but to collect our thoughts and be mindful of our actions. One of our major strengths from our friends’ perspective is that we speak to Xavier like he’s a big kid, and we did so even when he was little. We recognize that to him, everything is important and don’t minimize his experiences or feelings. Because of this, he communicates confidently when speaking with children or adults.
Our Family
Kris comes from a big family spread throughout New York and Canada, and has about 40 aunts, uncles, and cousins living within a one-hour drive of our home. Every Christmas we rent out a large hall to have a big family party. Santa always makes an appearance with gifts for the kids. Even though the family is large, we always have room for more!
Tom is close with a large extended family, spanning three continents. His parents and brother’s family live in Texas, and Xavier visits his cousins (ages 5 and 6) at least twice each year. We also have a network of friends locally with children ages infant through tweens, and we meet up for playdates and local events.
Final Thoughts
Thank you for considering our family. We hope our words have given you a glimpse into our lives, and shown you the unconditional love that we are ready to share with your little one. We have the deepest respect for the complexities of your decision to consider adoption, and want you to know that we are here to support you throughout the adoption process. Thank you.
